A friend of mine came by last week with her 7 month old son. He was ready for the pool in his special swim shirt, diaper and suit. A perfect little neon orange and blue shrink wrapped baby.

His Buddha belly was in a losing battle with his swim shirt and no matter how many times I pulled it down, it would instantly spring back up like an overused window shade from 1979.

As parents we are always preparing for the next stage of our children’s growth. The expectation is built into the system. We track our pregnancies knowing that the baby is now the size of a grape, now a fist, now an eggplant. We buy the next size up in advance and plan to take them back to school shopping, anticipating they’ve grown.

We may begrudge it but we don’t ignore it. Regardless how you feel about shopping for the kid’s clothes, gear, shoes etc, researching summer camps or understanding where they’re at developmentally, you’re doing it. Most important though is that you expect to. You count on it, account for it and plan for it.

As adults we seem to forget that we ourselves are in the same steady stream of growth that we have been in since our own birth. We still need to count on that and account for it, the same way we do for our children.

At what age do we stop attending to our own inevitable growth? Instead of buying a new swim shirt that fits us now, we MacGyver the old one to stay in place with duct tape, clothespins, a sewing needle or chewing gum. We tolerate ourselves pulling the proverbial shirt over our bellies 1000 times a day and say we don’t mind. We make do, get used to it, live with it. It’s fine. Really.

At no point do we turn to our children and prepare them for the end of their evolution unless we are discussing the cycle of life and death. Yet we refuse to acknowledge this truth of our own experience.

Is it when we alert our kid’s to the fact that after the age of 20 or so they likely won’t be going up a size in winter boots or coats each year that we accidentally suggest that they are done growing as people? Is it the transition into adulthood or workforce where this is conveyed?

Have we really associated the timeline of our physical development with that of our minds and spirits?

Until we take our last breath, we are all still growing into ever more whole human beings. Each day is a chance to create and expand. Whatever shape your belly or size swim shirt, you can choose to fight it or plan on it.

Expecting to change, to grow and to evolve as human as it gets. Are you fighting with your swim shirt or are you ready to get one that fits?